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Monday, May 1, 2017

Life by Elise Noble Blitz

Elise Noble
Publication date: April 30th 2017
Genres: Adult, Comedy, Romance
At twenty-eight years old, the only men in lawyer Cate Jenkins’ life are her two cats, Thor and Loki, unless you count her not-so-secret love affair with Ben & Jerry.
Escape comes in the form of art classes, where life drawing model Joe provides a welcome distraction from the monotony of her job. Each Thursday for five weeks, she gets to lose herself in a world of twinkling blue eyes and chiselled abs.
Meanwhile, next-door neighbour Dane is determined to win her heart. Can his gifts of coffee and kitty treats win out against muscled perfection?

Meeting Joe
“Ladies and gentleman.” Delores glanced over at Miguel, the sole male in the room. “We’ve got a treat tonight. The lovely Joe is going to model for us.”
She beckoned to someone behind us, and jaws dropped as Joe ambled to the front of the class, wearing only a sheet around his waist. He perched on the stool while Delores arranged the fabric to cover the good bits, and then he followed her directions to, “Lean forward a bit. Move your hand.”
Beside me, Marie’s pencil rolled out of her fingers and under Miguel’s chair, and it took him a second or two to snap his eyes away from Joe and retrieve it for her.
Finally happy with Joe’s pose, Delores clapped her hands. “This evening, we’re going to practice our sketching. Joe’s going to move every twenty minutes, which will give you the chance to explore various positions.”
From the way the other girls were salivating, I knew exactly which positions they wanted to explore. Even Marie, who had a boyfriend. I reached over and tapped her pad.
“We’re supposed to be drawing.”
“I’m committing his muscles to memory before I start. Wonder what would happen if I visited the ladies’ room and accidentally tripped over that sheet?”
With Marie, I could never quite tell if she was serious. This was the woman who’d once scrambled over a screaming crowd to clamber on stage with Justin Timberlake and managed to squeeze his ass before security hauled her away. I knew because she showed me the video on her phone. Loosening Joe’s sheet would be nothing for Marie.

Author Interview

If you were a cartoon character, which would you be and why?
Angelica out of the Rugrats. I actually did dress up as her once, for a fancy dress gymkhana (games on horseback). The rest of my team were Tommy, Chuckie, Phil, and Lil, which meant I was the only person trying to ride a horse in a dress. I’m pretty sure no photos exist, thank goodness.

Who would play you in a movie about your life?
Me—it’s my life, after all. But I’m pretty sure nobody would want to watch a movie about a ditzy blonde who sleeps a lot, takes three goes to get into a parking space, and burns everything she cooks.

Who are your top three authors to read?
Only three? I’d have to pick one from each of my favourite genres - Kristen Ashley for romance, John Sandford for thrillers, and Janet Evanovich for comedy.

Do you prefer sunshine or snow?
Sunshine. Always sunshine. I don’t do cold. I firmly believe I was born in the wrong country, and I have a very large collection of scarves and polo necks.

Chocolate, ice cream, or french fries?
French fries. I’m a sucker for potato-based products.

What’s your life motto?
Learn from your past, but live for the future.

What’s your favourite place to write?
Dahab in Egypt. The people are lovely, the weather’s always hot, and there are any number of beach-front restaurants with free wifi that are happy for me to sit and work with my MacBook. Back in the UK, I like to write on my iPad in bed.

Author Bio:
Elise Noble is an English rose with a few thorns who loves chocolate, sleep, and well-defined abs. Not hers, unfortunately. She lives near London with a sexy chef, a horse who eats all her money, and a dog who eats her car keys. Always a reader, she took up writing after inspiration struck in an old manor house, and still pinches herself at the fact that people read her books. She spends her days working in an office and her nights dreaming up new characters for you to fall in love with. Elise currently writes the Blackwood Security series of romantic thrillers and the Trouble series of romantic comedies.



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